A thrill of hope - Christmas Eve

Since I can remember, I’ve deeply loved Christmas Eve, especially after everyone has gone to bed, and the house is quiet. Many Christmas Eves have found me listening to Christmas carols at the foot of a lighted Christmas tree. A quiet, holy blanket settles on my soul at this time – reminding me that in Jesus my every need, known and unknown, felt and yet unfelt, is fully met. 

This Christmas Eve is no different. The family has all gone to bed (as a matter of fact, Mia, our large dog, has settled herself onto my side of the bed…) – and I am here, soaking in the precious and wondrous truth that the God who set life in motion, who is still expanding the universe, reached out for me. 

Over the past couple of days, I've been pondering Isaiah 8 & 9. The second half of chapter 8 establishes that when we are not grounded in God, we are lost: in darkness, distress, despair, even cursing God, and seeing nothing good in heaven or earth. Then comes chapter 9: "Nevertheless.." I love how often God's word pivots on a word, and this time, it's nevertheless. Even though we were far, even though we said "No," even though we had declared ourselves His enemies - He said 'Nevertheless' and sends His Son, the Child, the Light, the Answer that we all so desperately need - whether we know it or not. And He is all: Counselor, Father, God, Prince of Peace.

Let me share what I hear with you, the words of one of my favourite Christmas carols, "O Holy Night": 

"Long lay the world in sin and error pining, 

Til He appeared and the soul felt its worth.

A thrill of hope. The weary world rejoices.

For yonder breaks a new and glorious morn.

Fall on your knees. O hear the angel voices..."

And those voices resounded with "Good news of Great Joy that will be for all the people..." (Luke 2:10)

A call... (thoughts from September)

I have often struggled with 'me'. Often wishing, thinking that I should be different than I am, bemoaning my traits, belittling the 'me' that I am. Trying hard to force my shape into that of the cookie-cutter ideal I see. But I never stay in that shape, and I'm not happy in that shape.
Yet, there is a balance -- as Jesus tells me to deny myself, so I cannot just assume that as I am is as He wants me to be...

I read a poem this morning by Mary Oliver titled "The Other Kingdoms":

"Consider the other kingdoms... the creatures, with...their infallible sense of what their lives are meant to be. Thus the world grows rich, grows wild, and you too, grow rich, grow sweetly wild, as you too were born to be." 

Her words reminded me of Jesus' words to His disciples, His words to me: "Consider the lilies of the field... consider the birds of the air.."
As I follow His lead, I learn - but it is in the following.

"The grand point is not to wear the garb, nor use the brogue of religion, but to possess the life of God within, and feel and think as Jesus would have done because of that inner life. Small is the value of external religion unless it is the outcome of a life within."
CH Spurgeon "Spiritual Parenting" p. 154

Joy Dare - July 7

Gift of Challenge, Conflict and Change
These three are summed up in one for me right now : parenting.  Actually, two - and marriage.
Parenting holds the challenging reality that I am shaping other eternal creatures lives, the conflict of growing personalities bumping into one another (and mine) and change, well, kids don't stay the same for very long, do they?  Nor do they allow my plans to stay in place long, either.
In marriage there is a continual challenge to love another more than myself, the conflict of two living as one flesh, and the need for me to change and to be changed.  This is my Father's will for me - and it is good, very good - not always easy.  (A thought on conflict too: it is not always a negative thing.  It is through conflict that we are shaped: "As iron sharpens iron so one man sharpens another" Proverbs 27:17)
These four relationships are not only jewel-like gifts in themselves, but the challenge, conflict and change that they present drive me back to my Father for wisdom, grace - and oh, everything.

So thank you, my Father.

Still counting.

(Although I have not been posting these here - I have been counting and thanking.)

115. the first thing in the morning snuggle of the littlest boy.

116. a deep breath of dusky summer air

117. the stirring of wind-touched trees

118. ... and ears to hear the sounds

119. a good place to live and make a home

120. the Father's protection over my boys

121. a new season of life and all the surprises that my Lord has planned ahead

122. new and good friends

123. the coolness of a rain-drizzled morning after days of hanging heat

124. a child's footsteps in the morning

125. a colourful stripey cup

126. a God who came

127. the He is full of compassion

128. good books

129. laughter

130. the astounding variety of bird calls

131. the laughing call of a kookaburra

132. memories floating by on my computer screen

133. the dry cracking buzz of a cicada in flight

134. the focussed interest of a boy- intent on catching skimmer bugs to give them 'a happy life' in his aquarium

135. the sun rising and casting more light

136. the early light creeping down the trees

137. the sure knowledge of His great love

138. the mist hanging low on the hills

139. the opportunity to teach

140. a child's excitement that wakes him early and keeps him up

141. quiet that bookends my day

142. being home

143. garbage trucks trundling away my rubbish

144. a dad and his wife who look for ways to bless us all the while pouring love and attention into the boys

145. the boisterous sounds of boys at play

I want to keep counting, to keep naming, to keep being aware - because I am finding that in this simple act of naming His gifts given to me, I am seeing Him.

It's been a while...

"Moses returned to the Lord and said, 'O Lord, why have you brought trouble upon this people...and you have not rescued your people at all.'" (Exodus 5:22-23)

How often I have brought a similar charge to lay at God's feet, verbalized or silently. When circumstances get to the point where I feel like I am in far beyond my ability, when relationships are challenging or stale, when long-standing situations seem stagnant - then I accuse God, like a petulant child.

What I do not do is wait - trustingly wait. Believe and watch.

God answers Moses, not with a rebuke but with an affirmation of his own character, "I am the Lord." He bookends his reply to Moses with the assertion of who he is, because He is the reason we can believe, we can trust and we will see his deliverance. Even when Moses reminded the Israelites of God's character, "they did not listen because of their discouragement and cruel bondage" (6:9); that did not deter God.

My moments of discouragement do not discourage God - He reminds me to lift my eyes to his unchangeable self and to still and quiet my soul "like a weaned child with its mother" (Psalm 131:2). For He does not change - He is.

Thank you, Father.

An encouragement

Yesterday at church the pastor shared some wonderful truth from God's word that I have been pondering...

2 Peter 1:4 "Through these [His glory and goodness] He has given us His very great and precious promises, so that through them you may participate in the divine nature..."

I have to go now, but I'd like to share more here later.