Monday

Sunday night found me wondering why? Monday morning found me wondering how? Now I am wondering what Tuesday will bring.

Ah. But one thing I do know - it will bring more gifts from my Father.

21. a kitchen window that looks out on a green paddock and grazing goats

22. little boys' drawings in my notebooks

23. a child hand slipping into mine

24. fresh cool morning air

25. revelations glimpsed in ordinary moments

26. eyes that can see and feast on colour

Thank you, Lord. More, please may I see more.

a Shoebox

We spent the day today shopping for gifts to fill our shoeboxes. I want the boys to know (I want to remember) how exceptionally blessed we are. How much we have.

This year we are participating in Operation Christmas Child by Samaritan's Purse. We'd filled shoeboxes a couple of years back, but I wasn't sure if the boys remembered. So, I showed them a couple of YouTube clips about Operation Christmas Child - it was great. I think the videos really brought the idea alive to the boys (and me).

It has been precious to me to hear them praying for the boys who will receive their gifts. It feels like such a small step in guiding them to look beyond themselves, but it is a step. And we move step-by-step.

We spent an afternoon shopping to fill the boxes. I delighted to see how excited the boys were to get things for someone else. One of the most memorable moments was after they had each drawn a picture to include, B asked me; "Mum, do you think he'll like my picture?" He'd put his heart into it.

I am grateful for the opportunity to be with my boys.

More and more

13. warm sunshine after the rain,

14. running water,

15. sisters, nieces, nephews, parents, brothers - family,

16. suiting them up and sending the three of them off on an adventure,

17. laughter,

18. the prayer of a husband as he leaves for work,

19. the creative menagerie of morning bird calls,

20. an orderly day,

"Wait and See"

I woke up with this song in my mind and heart.

"There is hope for me yet,

because God won't forget all the plans He's made for me.

I have to wait and see.

He's not finished with me yet.

He's not finished with me yet.

Still wondering why I'm here.

Still wrestling with my fear.

But, oh, He's up to something.

and the farther on I go, I've seen enough to know that I'm not here for nothing,

He's up to something"

by Brandon Heath

How glad I am that this is true. He is not finished with me yet.

Knowing this lends me patience with myself. It gives me grace to deal more kindly with the hearts God has entrusted to me.

This morning

Here I am.

It is what I have. The here, the now. The yesterdays are done. The tomorrows are beyond my control. God has given me the now.

Last night I was wishing I was good at something. I mean really good, but I'm not. I am me. I don't have great talents, great wealth, great time, great ideas to present to the King. Just me. And this is probably His mercy, because knowing me I would try to earn His love, find my worthiness in the things I do, my filthy rags, rather than humbly take His hand.

So, this day, this moment - here I am. A beloved piece of dust.

A beginning

Here I am.

I am joining the Gratitude Community (thank you , Ann) today. I've been reading from the sidelines for a while now. The Father has been urging me toward the habit of gratitude and toward writing for a long while now. Too long.

1. I am thankful for a patient God of grace who draws me near.

In the midst of the daily days it is so easy to lose sight of His fingerprints. They're everywhere. I look forward to waking up to seeing, hearing and tasting His goodness in new ways.

2. quiet mornings

3. a warm cup of tea between cool hands

4. overflowing tanks

5. a man who loves me

6. the colour green filling my kitchen window

7. living in a land not at war

8. the soft comfort of a cat's fur

9. a boy who doesn't give up on me even when I am cranky

10. this breath . . .

11. goodnight kisses

12. being alive with this man and these boys

In these moments I choose to say 'Thank You, Father.' May I learn to say this in all moments.

Here I am.